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leap of faith

I read a quote ' Take a giant leap of faith, the chasm cannot be crossed in two small jumps '
and i said to myself... do i have the courage and fith to take the giant leap??
I have been so secure and safe on this side of the chasm.. would i ever have the courage to risk all and take the leap..make a life altering choice in one bold sweep, rather than the gradual change which we generally desire. I have often envied my friends who make 'radical' decisions , like giving foreign exams with nothing in the name of security , to fall back on. risking, having faith, dangerously ..believing...
It's beyond me. So on the auspicious occassion of the maharashtrian new yr i thought of ..well looking back on my life and choosing the 'giant leaps' and realised that in every day life we make these decisions. Decisions or choices ,which are a resounding yes or no..and not a 'maybe' .. 'hmm let's take it slowly' . Now for example on a cold morning when the geyser isn't working ..the first mug of cold water, or the fiirst spray of cold sshower.. i mean i keep thinking what would be the least painful way to have a bath , but in the end just grit my teeth and get it done with. Brrrr.Or like asking for leave from prof, you keep thinking for weeks on end what would be the best time, place and occasion to ask him the L question, till the run up ends..and u take that leap of faith, and enter that room, and say Sir ...ummm hmm i wanted leave of absence for 2 days... and suddenly just like that..u r soaring across the chasm.
It's not easy, but some things in life cannot be broken down into stages .. into the tiny steps..to a greater good..a higher plane.. NOPE . Sometimes what we need is one giant leap and not a small step.
Every day people around me are doing it..applying for the dream job, asking out the girl of their dreams, going bald, getting a tattoo , quitting their job, making that call..
Some say , these risk taking priviliges are for the moneyed only, others say it is for people who have no money of their own, they have nothing to lose. I think it takes a different type of strength , a strength of self.Where you can say to your self , i do this for me, whether i win or lose, I am a better person for having done it .
This new year i vow to take my leaps of faith..may be crash or safely land, but I won't know untill i let go of the fear, run up to the edge , and leap of the edge..

Comments

Meghana said…
Kuheli!!

You said it. It doesn't take much till you type out what seems like a harmless sms, but it feels like your intestines are all knotted up when it comes to selecting the 'send' option. At that point in time, bungee jumping seems simpler!

And yes, no amount of 'Main hoon na' from friends helps - it takes your own mind to push yourself to take the plunge...

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