Skip to main content

birthday retrospection.

Turning twenty five tomorrow.. and it's got me thinking..
I had this grand big list of things to do before I turn 25. So I guess it was time to retrospect. Now I could have retrospected without having blogged about it, but then today was a particularly not nice day. On a scale of 1- 10 I would give it a measly 4. But then pre birthday blues make birthday blasts even more special.
I am going to turn 25, and looking back on the years I realise that they haven't been easy years. As I sit in my balcony today, pondering my future while the sun sets, I realise that what I have in front of me, is no where as scary as the years I have already lived.
Childhood was no child's play. School homeworks, terminal exams, PT sessions, all of them came with their anxious moments. Making new friends, joining new schools.. coping with growing up. There were big hurdles like board exams, but what I remember are the small trifes. Even now when I see kids playing hide and seek, I remember dreading the thought of being the den-ner.Dreaded stammering or pronouncing a word wrong when my turn came to read out a passage from the lesson. These were all palpable fears, and a part of life. Childhood is great, but when people say it was great, it's because the passage of time has covered the memories in a patina of nostalgia. It was great , but it wasn't easy.Don't fear the future, if you look back at your past you will realise all the tough times which you faced and triumphed.
Teenage and college life wasn't a cake walk either. Body image issues, choosing a career, getting the marks to go with the career choice.. life was a roller coaster. Yet we look back and say..those were the best days of my life. There were so many monents of self doubt and uncertainty. Not knowing which way to turn, whom to trust, what to do.. but yet it all turned out all right.
That is when I realised... Hey I am leading the best time of my life right NOW. I don't have to worry about missing the school bus, I don't have terminal exams, I don't have to worry about what I want from life. I have run the rat race.. have yet to start a married life which will come with it's stifes.. I have great friends.. and am training in my dream career..
So what if one day turned out to be a measly 4 on 10.. there have been tons of days in my life which have been 4 and worse.. Days when I lost an elocution competition, lost the lemon race, didn't get the part I wanted in the school play.. and yet I survived.
That's the beauty of time.. it passes by.. the foul memories fade.. and we look back at our childhood with joy.. our youth with happiness..
I am 25.. and it's been an eventful 25 years.. and I am kinda proud of what I have made of myself..
For everyone who is turning any age..be it 5, or 10, or 50.. I would say give yourself a pat on your back.. you deserve to celebrate ..coz life ain't for the faint hearted.

Comments

Anonymous said…
Happy Birthday and well said. :)

25 is where *I* wish to GOD I could be!
Akshay said…
Three cheers to you :).. N thirty cheers to life :) !!
Unknown said…
awesome!! you are right!! the good life is not for the faint hearted!

Popular posts from this blog

birthday retrospect : Lebensmude and other Midlife things

This year will be the 11 th Birthday retrospect;it is a promise I keep to myself, where I write my thoughts on growing a year older. I started writing a birthday retrospect on my 25th birthday and this year being my 35th birthday post. (read last years post  BR 2018 )
This year went by in a blur –and I was happy about it. Earlier, my reaction used to be, “ Oh my God! This week went by so fast, where did the time go?” , but this year I couldn’t wait for the months to roll by. I was in a WHY IS LIFE TAKING SO MUCH TIME TO PASS BY mode . Ah! I can feel that a lot of people reading this are going to be surprised by this. Because I have always been someone plugging my day with many things to do, I was someone who was a ‘go getter’ kind of person, so much to do in life, so much to see in life, the girl with the biggest FOMO or Fear of missing out. This year I had flipped completely to the opposite spectrum. I didn’t want to do anything new. It wasn’t like I was demeaning the act of disco…

The gift

A few days back a close friend of mine received a gift. A large box wrapped in purple gift wrapping, ribbons and all, with a note saying “thank you doctor, from the Martins family” * (name changed to protect privacy)
A sweet gesture which a few patients still followed. A token of gratitude apart from the fees they paid and the medical bills. The medical profession has been subjected to major mud slinging in the past few years and small gestures of gratitude and appreciation mean a lot to us trying to do the best we possibly can.
But this gift was different.
“your patients must really like you.” I said, especially since I knew that many of his patients considered him family, and would get him fruits from their gardens, home made wines or cakes for Christmas, sweets on Diwali.
the patient died. She had terminal cancer, there wasn’t much that I could do. I didn’t want to take the gift, but the family insisted…” he replied
The doctor patient relationship is a tenuous one. The giver and …